Hyacinth Girl

The job I have doesn't involve much work, from what I can tell. They pretty much leave me alone and I have maybe 8 tasks to do each day. My day is broken up by covering the front desk several times for the receptionist's breaks. So, to fill my days (and to look like I'm doing work so I won't be disturbed), I have been reading books online (one so far, so more like a book online). I have just completed 1984. I've told myself that I'll spend my time away from academia catching up on things I should have read a long time ago, or at least trying to do that. I did enjoy reading 1984, though I didn't know how much of a downer the end is going in. I enjoyed it and got caught up in it, etc., but I think my anxiousness to continue reading was almost as much because I didn't have anything else to do as much as it was to get back to the story. One very strange thing did happned, though...

I have a tendency to get lost in media sometimes--in books, films, and music mostly. This doesn't happen all the time, but frequently enough so that I'm a bit used to it, even though it's a very surreal sensation. Most of the time, I disconnect from reality and the thoughts in my head seem more real than the everyday normalcy that's going on around me. This usually lasts for a couple of hours or so, and I usually spend some time alone and then it dissipates. Today, as I was reading the final chapters of Orwell's dystopia, this occurrence happened and took on a new level. I suddenly thought about something that I may or may not have been dreaming about the past couple of days. It may have been a thought that ran through my head while I've been reading for the past week or it may have been purely from a dream. I became dizzy and nauseous and had to hold the edge of the desk in front of me to steady myself. My thoughts moved slowly and I kept glimpsing the edges of them, trying to remember what they were and where they were from. It was a very odd feeling and I don't think I'm describing it very accurately. I felt some physical pain along with the dizziness and nausea. And now, two and a half hours away from the incident, I can remember it and not remember it at the same time. It was very odd.

But, now I have to go cover a break and decide what I want to read next.